35 Short Life Lessons on Turning 35
The good practices must continue every year...
I first thought to skip it this year.
But then memory lane took me to the reflections I did when I turned 34, 33, 32, 31, 30, 29, 28, and 27. Whoa! I don’t remember when I was this proud :)
That is the good thing about doing good things consistently. The consistency just does not let you off the hook.
So, here you go, 35 life lessons on turning 35, ladies and gentlemen:
You don’t have to twist your way into being mean. You’ll be surprised how much you can get done by being genuinely nice and caring, with every human.
Skill and attitude are the things that create confidence. Confidence and charisma without competence and curiosity is a lame victory.
When you work super hard in your 20s (7-8 hours per day) you will be able to work 4-5 hours towards your 30s.
Having a trauma is sometimes not a choice. Living with a trauma is.
Stop giving free consultations and keep your mouth shut. Give advice when asked for (by immediate family) and when paid (by everyone other than immediate family), and not when you simply think they need it.
A good night sleep and breakfast within an hour of waking up solve for most of your energy problems.
You must do the work.
Change your environment if you do not like it. I remember I started watching cricket regularly from Asia Cup 2023 (that India won), watched World Cup 2023, and then kept track of other tournaments, and then spent a lot of time scrolling memes on Twitter after India won World Cup in 2024, Champions Trophy in 2025 and when RCB won IPL in 2025. Super guilty. Never led to anything good. It was after that I realised it is not the best use of my time. So now I do not check Twitter during any sporting tournament. Simple as this. It once got out of hand (which meant I was on Twitter for over an hour), so I temporarily deactivated it. Change your environment, do not expect it to change it for you.
Related to the above, as I was reflecting that my 20s went too slow but half of 30s went tad bit faster, I realised it is because a little bit of my internet consumption has gone up, even though I am super careful. So, now I will bring it down further. If you think you do not have a lot of time, ruthlessly and drastically cut internet usage. Get a 2 GB per month plan if you need to, but the only currency you have is time.
It’s okay to not like doing the things in your 30s that you liked doing in your 20s.
Life is all about changing your inner conversation with yourself.
If something upsets you, do not bury it within. Talk to yourself and figure what upset you. And then figure if you can change it or accept it. Do it. If you bury things, they give rise to diseases eventually.
If you really really care, you can bring about all the transformation in yourself. But it begins with not expecting others to transform too.
Anyone who taught you how to be less kind and more nonchalant towards others is a liar, is a traitor. Please do not listen to them.
Classy people have a list of most gifted books instead of a list of favourite YouTube channels.
Show me your morning routine and I will show you what your day would look like.
Show me your night routine and I will show you how peaceful you’d wake up in the morning.
True richness lies not in making Instagram posts about your achievements but writing essays about your despairs (cough cough ;)).
If you keep saying yes to everyone, you keep saying no to yourself.
The art of living life is to navigate situations that require you to say no, where you consistently say no without actually saying no.
Working with the right people is 1000X more important than working on the right project. Please read that again.
Your source of motivation has to be you. If “talking to this one person” makes you feel better, you will always be their prisoner.
Please do yourself a favour and read Consolations from a Stoic by Seneca (the Kindle version is cheaper than your chips packet), So Late in the Day by Claire Keegan (especially every sensitive girl and every gentleman must read it) and the newsletter of Cal Newport.
It is more important to decide what you will not do than to figure what you will do.
A good life should have no place for ego.
Life is all about returning to the childhood version of you.
When I am acting different than you had expected me to, will you still love me while trying to ask me what lead me to this opinion to understand me, or will you abandon me because I did not fit your mental mould?
Speaking less is the OG (and the most underrated) way to have more energy.
Happy people make time to go to a park or outdoors during the Golden Hour.
It is mind blowing how you become a walking energy of possibilities when you even stop having ideas of impossibilities.
Exercise is a necessity for your body and productivity, walking is a medicine for your mind and soul.
No matter when you travel and where you travel, always pack at least a shawl and a pair of socks. It is a staple.
“Life a good life and tell no one. People ruin beautiful things.” I remember reading this once long ago, and it is only around turning 35 you start understanding the truth of this statement.
That is it friends, which one did you like the most? Tell me, tell me!!
PS: I know, I know I had to share the essay essay “How to become a successful freelancer” today but bro I am in the middle of submitting the final manuscript of 3 books (the last 10% takes the 90% of effort, each time). And I also I am in the middle of a much-needed 4-day meditation retreat, writing this at 5 am after our morning meditation. Your special sneak peek into the life of a freelancer :))
This is the picture after our evening meditation that is held everyday from 6.30-7.30 pm, and it was a special one because it was outdoors in some ~23 degrees. Hope this qualifies for you to forgive me :)
I promise I will write that freelancing essay.
See you next Saturday.
Nishtha Gehija
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